|
Resource Center : Top Ten Lists : Agents : Improve the Quality of Your Life
The Top 10 Standards to Develop
for Yourself
Category: Personal Foundation (BJ8)
Originally Submitted on 8/28/96.
Standards are what you do for yourself
or behaviors to which you willingly adhere. To live without standards is to
place yourself at the whims of chance, others, and the world. Here are ten areas
in which it is useful to have standards, along with some suggestions as to how
to get started.
1. Honesty.
Being honest with yourself and others
is a source of power. Being honest means that no one can call your bluff. In
setting a standard of honesty, ask yourself: "When do I tell the truth, the
whole truth? When I do remain silent? Under what conditions is it appropriate
to tell another person only what I know he/she is ready to accept?"
2. Integrity.
Integrity is living a value-based life.
Integrity is broader and more inclusive than honesty. To gauge your standard
of integrity, ask yourself: "What is my 'bottom line'--the bedrock standard
that covers what I will do or not do irrespective of external pressures?" Integrity
is the basis of authentic being and true friendship.
3. Power.
Power enables you to act, to maintain
your integrity and honesty, and to enforce your standards. Ask yourself: "What
is the source of my power? Is my power derived from within (self-referral) or
from outside (object-referral)?" The closer you are able to move towards self-referral,
the more reliable your power will be.
4. Commitment.
Your commitment is a measure of your dedication
to what you do and believe in. Only full commitment offers a promise of excellence.
To commit only partially is to invite mediocrity. Ask yourself, with respect
to each aspect of your life, work and play: "What is my level of commitment?
What am I willing to commit to 100%?"
5. Acceptance.
Acceptance and approval are different.
To approve (or disapprove) is to judge. To accept is to recognize and acknowledge
what IS. Acceptance eliminates the need to judge and quiets the mind. Ask yourself:
"Am I willing to accept (not approve) others, situations, life, etc. as they
are or it is? What am I not willing to accept?" It's interesting to note that
accepting a situation "as is" does not forfeit your right to change it.
6. Tolerance.
Tolerance has both negative and positive
connotations. On the one hand is the question of what we are willing to 'put
up with' in life; on the other, are issues pertaining to what we are willing
to forgive. Both are important. Ask yourself: "What am I tolerating that limits
my growth or happiness? What am I 'allowing' that aids my own or others' growth
or healing?"
7. Pace.
Horses and marathoners have pace--a rhythmic
style that makes trotting and running seem easy. Pace is measured relaxed action.
Many of us lack pace in our lives. For each endeavor in which you are engaged,
ask yourself: "What is the pace at which I feel completely comfortable? Am I
willing to adhere to it despite pressures to the contrary?"
8. Reserve.
Reserve is a margin, the gas in the tank
or the cushion in the account. To have reserve is to be freed from the demands
of circumstance or crisis. There are ten areas of reserve. Ask yourself: "What
are my reserves of time, space, money, energy, opportunity, love, information,
wisdom, self, and integrity?"
9. Fitness.
Fitness is physical, mental, and spiritual.
To be "fit" is to be more than prepared to deal with what comes at you. Fitness
is a process whereby we create reserves of energy. Ask yourself: "What are my
standards for physical (aerobic & muscular), mental (intellectual &
emotional), and spiritual fitness?" What is the minimum level of performance
in each of these areas that I am willing to accept?" (In the area of spiritual
fitness, you may want to look at Top Ten lists, number 21, "Ten Ways to Tell
When You're in Alignment," and number 51, "Ten Principles of Transformation".)
10. Communication/Relationships
While the journey into and beyond this
life is a solo one, we live in concert with others. The standards we maintain
with respect to how we communicate and what is the basis of our relationships
are critical in determining the success with which we negotiate this journey.
Ask yourself: "What is my basis for communicating with others? Am I direct,
indirect, or a combination of the two? On what are my relationships based (need,
mutuality, giving)? What am I willing to give to others? What do I expect to
receive in return?" ... These ten areas are illustrative rather than inclusive.
The areas you select and the standards you set for yourself must be appropriate
for you. If you need additional help in this regard, you may want to obtain
a copy of, or enroll in, Coach University's Personal Foundation course. Also,
you may want to consider taking the course under the guidance of a skilled coach.
About the Submitter
The original source is: Written
by Shale Paul, Executive Coach. Copyright 1996, Coach University. May be reproduced
or transmitted if done so in its entirety, including this copyright line.
Copyright 1997, 98, 99, Coach University
This content may be forwarded in full, with copyright/contact/creation
information intact, without specific permission, when used only in a not-for-profit
format. If any other use is desired, permission in writing from CoachU is required,
with notification to the original author. Questions: email pam@coachu.com
Copyright © 1996-2003 RealEstateCoach.com, a subsidiary of Teleclass4U.com, LLC.
All rights reserved. No reproduction, distribution, or transmission of copyrighted
materials on this site is permitted without written permission.
«« Back to Improve the Quality of Your Life Top Ten Lists
Top of page
|
